Helping Shy Kids Feel Included: A Parent’s Peace Of Mind

HELPING SHY KIDS FEEL INCLUDED: A PARENT’S PEACE OF MIND

Parents sometimes share concerns that their child may be shy and might not wish to join in on stage. I always welcome this info so I can be extra aware in the show. I’ve had many shows with this situation and my approach ensures the child remains relaxed and happy throughout. Here’s how I handle this in case you also have concerns.

Firstly, it’s not important if the child joins me on stage; there’s never any pressure to participate. The show will be fun for them either way. If they’d prefer to watch the show with their friends then that is more than fine.

After the funny comedy warm-up, the children have warmed towards me. When I look for a volunteer to help me on stage, usually most of the children’s hands shoot up. Interestingly, I’ve found on many occasions that the shy child gets swept up in the excitement and wants to join in. I believe this is because all their friends are engaged, and it becomes a collective mentality. If the birthday child doesn’t raise their hand, I won’t put them on the spot. I will mention to them that they can help me by cheering and clapping with their friends so they still feel included.

If the child is keen, I ask them to join me on stage. If they’re eager and partake in a non-shy manner, I carry on as normal. However, I always remain aware they may suddenly lose enthusiasm and act accordingly (explained in the next point). If they join in but seem a little hesitant, I gently reassure them and say, ‘you’re welcome to sit with your friends and help me by cheering and clapping’. This approach lets them feel like they’re still helping and keeps everything positive. When they sit back down, I ensure they receive a big round of applause for being brave and joining me.

Even though I have my approach, I will always take full heed of the parents’ advice, remaining aware of the child’s responses throughout the show. I’ve had numerous shows where the child has not joined me at all on stage and still had a great time. This hasn’t affected the show, and I’m happy that everyone else at the party is enjoying themselves.

My goal is always to ensure every child has a magical experience at their comfort level. If you have questions about your child’s needs, feel free to call or email; I’m here to help.

I’m occasionally asked by parents what games I do in my parties and it’s always a bit of a mouth full to explain so I have wrote this for greater clarity. To begin with, none of my games are elimination based which means no one is ever ‘out’. This ensures all the children are engaged throughout and are not going to become bored which is very important to me. On to the games!

Character statues
I tell the children to dance and when the music stops to freeze and impersonate a well known character (superheroes, Disney princesses etc). I’ll pick the most creative one each time ensuring that everyone wins. If there are a lot of children, I’ll pick multiple winners each time so by the end they have all won.
Why it’s good – The children enjoy being on their feet, if they don’t want to pretend to be a character they will usually just  freeze normally so they still feel involved. It’s  easy to understand and we can play it instantly. The children are never bored in this game and are always riveted throughout. It’s been so good over the years.